I want to encourage you today…
Whatever happened in your past or is happening now — or in the future — you are not alone and you are not a failure.
Most men I know feel like failures in one area or another, whether it’s the board room, the dining room, the gym or the bedroom — or all, at times.
My strong encouragement is you find the help you need. Reach out to a wise friend, a safe group, a counselor or a pastor. You don’t have to give up to self-destructive behavior.
But how can you help someone else you see courting disaster?
This is tough. When a man is bound and determined on hurtful and self-destructive behavior — as I have been at times — his friends can advise, encourage or even try to intervene, but only he can open his heart to change.
Sometimes, the most important thing you can do is continue creating a safe space for him to share his struggle, and listen without judgment. I’ve been on the giving and receiving end of this myself.
The keys in both cases are the same: Patience, respect, confidentiality, persistence, truth-telling and restoration.
I still grieve for my friend in ministry who gave way to moral failure. I so wish he’d found his way to a welcoming, confidential circle of flawed but honest men, where he could safely unburden himself and start his healing journey. He would have spared himself and others a world of hurt.
Maybe you know someone making — or about to make — some bad choices. Maybe it’s you. Consider taking a breath and taking a better fork in the road. Life is too short to stay stuck on the wrong road.